News
Beatty Memorial Park Will Not Host Huge Music Festival.
In news that will surprise no one, Beatty Memorial Park will not be hosting any huge music festivals this year. That said, we may host several "Music in the Park" events. Over-capacity crowd arrangements are currently being discussed.
February 8th 2018
Beatty Memorial Park Too Small For Pet Parade
In news that will surprise no one, Beatty Memorial Park announced today that it is too small for any meaningful pet parade. Besides, The Procession of The Species is a pretty big deal and includes creatures big and small, so there.
March 1st 2018
Insect Parade Possible? "If they're comporting themsevelves well, then why not?"
In news that may surprise someone, Beatty Memorial Park formed a committee recently to explore the possibility of an insect parade, or so it was reported. "We have the acreage" Committee Member Anne Buck added "And if they can behave, if they're comporting themsevelves well, then why not?" Interested parties should stop in the Buck's Fifth Avenue store, adjacent to the park, to discuss.
April 1st 2018